It's finally happened....

It's finally happened and I am not sure if I am excited or sad as little Nico has finally crawled, the right way. Let me explain myself, you see little Nico has been getting around for quite some time between the rolling and the scooting, but didn't get the concept of crawling until yesterday. So here we are now trying to scramble in getting everything that was once just a dream of him getting, now has become a reality that what's in his reach is his....and what he wants, he wants and he'll do almost anything to get it!

So for those who haven't had the pleasure of running after a 7 month old, I now have a deeper respect for those parents who have two or three children as keeping up with him sometimes can be unimaginable to me!!! It's time for the gates and plugs for the electrical outlet all those things I have but didn't really think I would use, but here we are chasing after Nico and letting him know what the word NOOOO means. And although I know he hears me, I am not sure he cares as he is thinking.....all I have to do is look at them with my bright beautiful blue eyes and they'll give it to me......

So next time you are at my house and see me turn my head, it's not because I am not listening or interested in what you are saying, it's me waiting for that moment when once again I have to tell little Nico you can't put your slobbery fingers in the electrical outlets or climb the stairs....It's because it has happened, he is finally mobile and faster than any of us could of ever imagined!!!

CRAWLING....

A NEW ADVENTURE IS ABOUT TO BEGIN IN OUR HOUSE, LITTLE NICO HAS LEARNED HOW TO SCOOT AND I THINK IN A MATTER OF TIME HE'LL BE (NOOOO)....CRAWLING. IT SEEMS LIKE JUST YESTERDAY HE WAS BARELY ROLLING OVER, BUT NOW IT'S ROLL, ROLL, ROLL, AND THEN SCOOT, SCOOT UNTIL WHATEVER HE CAN SEE AND I USUALLY CAN'T, THAT HE HAS TO HAVE.

IT ALL BEGAN AT GRANDMA'S HOUSE WHEN GRANDPA PUT THE REMOTE ON THE FLOOR AND AS WITH ANY MAN HE LOVES THE REMOTE. SO WHEN IT WAS IN ARMS REACH OR WHAT HE THOUGHT WAS ARMS REACH HE WAS OFF. FIRST, IT WAS THE HALF ROLL TO SEE IF THAT WOULD MAKE HIM CLOSER AND THEN IT WAS THE BUTT UP IN THE AIR WITH THE HEAD DOWN AND FINALLY IT WAS HALF ROLL, HALF SCOOT UNTIL HE FINALLY GOT IT. WE ALL WANTED TO APPLAUDE HIM AS HE WORKED SO HARD, BUT AS ANYTHING ELSE THE FIRST PLACE IT WENT WAS IN HIS MOUTH AND MOMMY HAD TO BE THE BAD GUY TO TAKE IT AWAY AS BATTERIES AND SLOBER DO MIX :)

AFTER THAT DAY IT ONLY PROGRESSED TO TODAY WHERE THE HALF ROLL, HALF SCOOT HAS TURNED INTO THE FULL SCOOT AND CONTINUES TO GET EASIER FOR HIM EVERYDAY AND BEFORE WE KNOW IT HE'LL BE CRAWLING AROUND WONDERING WHERE IS THAT REMOTE.....IT WAS JUST HERE :)

THIS AMAZES ME AND UNTIL THIS MOMENT I DIDN'T REALIZE LITTLE NICO IS NO LONGER A BABY, BUT NOW A LITTLE PERSON WHO NO MATTER WHAT IT TAKES IS GOING TO GET THAT STINKING REMOTE!!!

Time is...


Isn't it funny how time can go by so quickly, yet seem so slow? When little Nicolas didn't want to give us the joy of his arrival in the timely manner I wanted him too, time went so slow. I think the month of September lasted the entire year, HA....but truly even though he is five and half months old, it seems time has flown but has stopped too. Which doesn't make much sense as Bryan would say, but to me it does. Let me give you an example, when his teeth were coming in...two of course at once....it seems liked forever until the points popped out, but now it seems like overnight they have shot out and he is turning into a little man. These moments make me sad to know that he'll never be the cuddly little newborn who depends on me for everything, but now is trying to be Mr. Independent by pushing the buttons on the toys by himself and figuring out how it makes noise in the first place. All of these things two months ago, I would of never thought it would happen this fast. Before we know it he'll be crawling and then walking....oh my gosh his life just shot before my eyes....AWWWWW.....

OK, time to slow down for a minute, but really time seems to be going faster as he does more and more, and I am trying to cherish every moment as it was my last. Anyone that's ever seen his smile knows what I mean when I say how could you do anything but love this child. So as he grows and learns new things everyday, it amazes me how smart he really is and that one day I know when he brings his 4th grade homework home...he'll actually know I am smarter than my parents.

So as the days fly by and Mommy and Daddy get busier with the hustle and bustle of the summer, I know that I have to step back and cherish these moments because one day before I know it, he'll be off doing what all kids do and move on to actually being... Mr. Independent that began when he was five months old.....

REALIZATION

ISN'T IT FUNNY HOW BABIES HAVE THEIR OWN LANGUAGE? FOR INSTANCE, LITTLE NICOLAS IN THE LAST COUPLE OF DAYS HAS FIGURED OUT THAT HE HAS TOES AND THAT HE HAS A VOICE. BEGINNING WITH THE TOES, NOW BEING EVEN MORE WIGGLY THAN BEFORE HE HAS DECIDED THAT IT HIS MISSION TO SEE HIS MOMMY STRUGGLE TO GET HIS DIAPER ON. SO INSTEAD OF BEING A PEACEFUL TIME, NOW HE SCOOTS, THROWS HIS LEGS DOWN AND GRABS HIS LITTLE PRECIOUS TOES UNTIL I AM READY TO WAIVE MY WHITE DIAPER TO SURRENDER. SAD BUT TRUE I HAVE FINALLY COME TO REALIZATION THAT HE IS IN CONTROL, IF HE DOESN'T WANT HIS DIAPER CHANGED IN A TIMELY MANNER, IT IS ME WHO HAS TO WAIT UNTIL PRECIOUS NICOLAS DECIDES, "OK MOMMY, I AM READY FOR MY DIAPER TO BE PUT BACK ON". UNTIL THAT MOMENT, I JUST THINK WHEN DID I LOOSE CONTROL?? HE IS ONLY FOUR MONTHS OLD, WHAT THE HECK IS IT GOING TO BE LIKE WHEN HE IS BIGGER THAN ME???

ALONG WITH MY DIAPER CHALLENGES, IT HAS ALSO COME TO MY ATTENTION THAT NICOLAS HAS FOUND HIS VOICE AND HE HAS ONE VOLUME THAT NEVER TURNS DOWN AND THAT IS "LOUD". I NEVER THOUGHT I WOULD THINK THAT I WISH HE WOULD JUST TONE DOWN A LITTLE BIT, AS LAST WEEK IT WAS SO CUTE WHEN HE SAID A WORD OR TOO IN HIS OWN LANGUAGE. BUT NOW AS I HAVE FOUND HE DECIDES THAT HE HAS SOMETHING TO SAY, WHATEVER IT MAY BE AND WE ARE GOING TO LISTEN. AND IF WE DON'T LISTEN OR HE CAN'T GET OUT FAST ENOUGH WHAT HE IS TRYING TO SAY IN HIS OWN LANGUAGE, THEN THE FIRST TAMTRUM IS ON.

HE IS GROWING UP SO FAST AND I AM TRYING TO TAKE EVERY MINUTE IN, BUT EVERYDAY HE CONTINUES TO AMAZE ME BY THE STUFF HE CAN DO AND HOW HE DOES IT. I GUESS BY VIDEOTAPING IT, IT WILL HELP US KEEP THE MEMORIES FOREVER AND ALWAYS.

CHRISTMAS MEMORIES

It is interesting to me to think about how innocent and wonderful a baby has made our lives. I never thought going into last Christmas season that here would we would be celebrating Christmas with our perfect little baby boy. Who this year has only brought joy and happiness in our lives, even when the little stinker won't go to sleep or throws up on my clothes right as I am ready to walking out the door. And so are his crazy parents who are playing this game of parenthood step by step wondering how we can be the best parents and hoping that we don't mess up his life. Even though thi s year he is just almost 3 months old, it will still be exciting to wake up on Christmas morning, getting him up and running downstairs to see what's under the tree from Santa. In reality it's all for us and the memories of his first Christmas with many, many more to come but I am more excited this Christmas then I have ever been since I can remember. It seems like I am counting down the minutes until we can tear open the presents that we bought him and even though I know what they are, the excitement in my eyes will only make him smile, which in turn will melt my heart. He is innocent and kind that making him smile everyday is my goal and to hear him laugh or talk to me in an unknown language makes me want to hold him close to my heart and love him in a way that I never knew until the birth of my little angel.

So when everyone is opening their gifts on Christmas morning, I will be soaking up every minute and cherishing those "little" moments that come with being mommy even if he is only smiling because in his mind he is thinking....are these really my parents??

WE'VE BECOME ONE OF THOSE FAMILIES.....

We'll it's funny how in an instant things change and how your life changes and you become "one of those families". When Bryan and I use to go out to a restaurant we use to always get stuck sitting next to one of those screaming kids who all through dinner their parents didn't seem to hear them yelling, kicking and screaming and I thought not my kid....we'll here we are with our precious little angel and although ninety percent of the time he is really good, he has his moments. It seems those moments come right when you least expect it, like in a restaurant right when you are taking your first bite of hot tasty food. Then here it comes, the scream that goes through you like fingernails down a chalkboard. And I always wondered why people that had kids like that went out to eat? Now I have finally realized that they do it to keep their sanity and to enjoy themselves, even if their precious little angel is shreaking like you just took his favorite toy away or he lost his best friend.

So I have become to have a respect and understanding for those parents that at one time I looked over at them like what the heck is wrong with you bringing your "bad" child out in public because I have now been in their shoes. When the child starts screaming you just want to curl in a ball and die because everyone must be looking at you, when really only a few don't understand the rest of us are looking at you out of sympathy knowing we all have been there. So the next time I hear a screaming child and it's not mine I just want to say we all are "one of those families" and no worries once the child figures out no one cares if they throw a fit or not, they will stop and you can finally enjoy that tasty, hot...we'll warm bite you craved.

We have all been there and those that haven't, one day you will and you'll understand what I mean when you become one of those families.

IDENTITY

Now that my precious little angel, at least now when he is sitting in his bouncer and listening to his Baby Einstein CD, is being content it gives me a moment to reflect on this last month...

It's funny how in a sense I have lost my identity as me and have become Nicolas' Mom. It seems the first thing out of everyone's mouth is how is Nicolas doing today or did he sleep last night? Not how are you today? Which in a sense I don't really mind because he is so special but it's funny how times change so quickly. That sometimes you get lost in the shuffle of everyone wanting to see him and you can't really prepare for it or expect it until it happens. Then you think when was the last time that I did something for myself? Probably not since he was born, but then I think he is depending on me for everything what can I really expect? When my Mom calls and asks how he is doing I jokingly say he is fine and so am I...she just laughs and says of course you are. It is pretty funny how fast life changes for the better of course and without any notice I have become Nicolas' Mom and will be known as that for the rest of my life here on earth. And truly wouldn't want it any other way.

So anyone who doesn't have children, once they do they will understand when I introduce my new self as Nicolas' Mom.

BECOMING MOMMY

It's funny how I look back now to 2005 and see all the frustrations and hurting I did when we tried for over a year to have a baby, to where we are now with our precious little angel. I was beginning to think that being a Mommy was not in the cards for me and wondering why I was being punished?? Everytime someone would tell me they were pregnant I would put a smile on my face and suck it up, when really inside I was crying out thinking...why not me? 2005 was a year I truly want to forget between not becoming pregnant and some other family issues, but 2006 started out with a bang....there is never a dull moment in our lives.

On January 23rd of this year, we were going to buy a new truck that Bryan had found and HAD to have :) and something just didn't feel right, I had been feeling sick and tired but thought it was just my head playing games with me again...but when we got home we realized it wasn't and FINALLY we were going to have a baby!!! I couldn't keep my emotions to myself and I knew that I couldn't tell ANYONE because maybe it was a hoax or something like that and I couldn't dare start telling people to have to tell them it was a mistake. So we kept it to ourselves until my first doctors appointment only telling my very best friend, Terri.

So finally we were going to have a baby and I guess it didn't really hit me until a month into it when we had to go to the hospital because I was having complications and I truly thought this was it. We had tried so hard only to have him taken away from us in an instant, which really made me realize that we as human beings have no control over anything and that it is all in God's hands. So all we can do is pray to God that everything is going to be ok and that there is a plan for everything whether we understand it or not. Fortunately for us it was only a false alarm and we continued on with caution knowing life is very precious.
I guess that's what I have learned throughout out this process of becoming Mommy is that no matter what we think or want to do, it's really not in our hands and we have to take each moment for what it is because it can be taken away from us in an instant without any notice. I love being Mommy and can't imagine my life without him even though it's only been 25 days that we have had the honor of being his Mommy and Daddy.